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Campaign:Episode Forty Five
Opening Crawl Examination! After cavalierly shoving their way through Immigration, the core crew of the Mynock has finally arrived on the surface of Phindar, disguised as traveling librarians. Now Smuggler Captain Trystan Valentine along with ex-Clone Trooper Bacta, and former ExplorCorps adventurer Lyntel’luroon must guide their friends, Bounty Hunter Leenik Geelo and undomesticated Force-sensitive space wolf Tony Vornskr to a doctor so they can get a prosthetic Rodian hand and round of vaccinations, respectively. Listen! Plot Summary Having landed in the Phindian treetop city of Cyclops, the Mynock crew goes to a nearby Enterprise Rent-a-Speeder… for transport. They attempt to rent two “standard” speeders, only to to be told that all “standard” speeders have been completely cleared out within the past two days. The kindly southern-accented reptilian manager of the Rent-a-Speeder explains that there was a “big rush” due to a large bounty-hunting convention in town - BHIKKE Work Week, the Bounty Hunter’s Killing & Kidnapping Expo - the present day being the first of five. After declining rental insurance, the group picks up two speeders, one “economy” (piloted by a one-handed Leenik) and one “premium” (piloted by Tryst) and flies them to the smaller, neighboring town of Biclops. During the 2-hour trip, Lyn reminisces about her previous trips to Phindar during school breaks with her oddly-named friend, Karke Sartek. Lyn reveals that she initially met Dr. Kabral on the Sartek family’s “veltuan grop” farm, where the doctor occasionally lent her services as a veterinarian. Later, during their “teenage smuggling adventures”, Lyn brought Karke to Dr. Kabral for medical assistance, after hearing that Dr. Kabral provided care to those who “did things on the sly”. Once arrived at Biclops’ bustling veterinary hospital, the group is shuffled off to a free office, as Tony’s presence immediately causes an adverse reaction in the other animals in the waiting room. While they wait for Dr. Kabral, Tryst and Lyn argue about the necessity of hacking Dr. Kabral’s office computer for underworld contacts, with Lyn saying that they could just as easily ask. The argument ends with Tryst comparing every conversation to a “gunfight”, in which there are definitive winners and losers. Soon after, Dr. Kabral enters the room. She is a Duros wearing a white lab coat and a stethoscope with a clip-on panda bear. The doctor has a long conversation with Leenik and the group concerning whether or not raising a wild space-dog on a smuggling ship would be safe or even healthy for Tony. To Leenik’s chagrin, she offers to take ownership of the vornskr. She also attempts to, unsuccessfully, end Bacta, Leenik, and Tryst’s (as well as James, Johnny, and JPC’s) going idea that Tony Vornskr is 400 pounds and “above-human intelligence”, by definitively stating that Tony is 162 pounds and has the intelligence of a normal dog. Although Dr. Kabral agrees to give Tony vaccinations and a day's-long battery of medical tests, she also gives the group a pamphlet about animal care as well as a warning: “Keeping a creature like this is not for everybody and isn’t always in the animal’s best interest. In fact, it almost never is.” In response, Leenik insists that his special relationship with Tony is the one exception. After being told to leave the office and to return at 8:30 for work on Leenik’s hand, the gang kills time piloting one of the rental speeders around Biclops and discussing the pros and cons of Bacta’s developing plan to “sneak into BHIKKE.” The boys realize that, coincidentally, the galaxy-renowned bounty hunting team of Sneak and Tubaik will be prominently featured at BHIKKE. Tryst reminds the group that, furthermore, Sneak and Tubaik had previously vowed to capture the Mynock crew at any cost. After ruminating on who else could be attending BHIKKE, the episode ends with the PCs resolving to attend, completely unprepared. Featured NPCs * Tony Vornskr * Dr. Kabral * Karke Sartek (Mentioned) * Randezvous Valentine (Mentioned) * Bossk (Mentioned) * Zero (Mentioned) * Jorj Car’das (Mentioned) * Misc: Reptilian Rent-a-Speeder Manager, Veterinary Receptionist, Short Bit-Enthusiast Nurse Bits * The List of Bounty Hunters begins. (Caution: spoiler alert: best viewed after listening to Episode Fifty One.) * The PCs botch their fake names a total of six times this episode. * In Campaign, all reptile aliens speak in a stage whisper or a southern accent. * The veterinary computers use an extremely advanced interface: Windows 98. * It is established in this episode that Panda Bears exist in the Campaign universe. Kat describes them as “highly parasitic." * Sneak and Tubaik are adept at promoting their - apparently lucrative - personal brand, having their own clothing line, merchandise, website, and convention employees. Notes * Kat's Aside: "In which, straight-faced, the boys try to tell a veterinary physician that Tony Vornskr weighs 400 pounds and possesses greater-than-human intelligence." * ''Dear Mynock ''Summary: An unstable fan writes to Leenik for advice on a blossoming relationship with Neimoidian Sparks. * Phindar has strict leash laws. * Leenik’s alias as “Cardamom Fives” was intentionally given a poor driving record. * Oddly enough, Tryst has an innate sense of Dr. Kabral’s height and exact age at first sight (5’ 5” and had turned fifty-four the previous week.) * Leenik had attended the past three consecutive BHIKKE Work Weeks before the current one. * Sneak once owned The Mynock before Tryst, Bacta, and Leenik stole it from him. * The boys are on vaguely good terms with Bossk, having done a favor for him before losing his Sabacc machine. According to Tryst, Bossk would still not hesitate to kill them if it served his interests.